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How to Handle Being Insulted/Bullied

Has there ever been a time when you felt completely disempowered by someone's remarks, embarassed and awash in negative thoughts and emotions?

No matter who you are, no matter what you've been through in your life, you've probably heard some snide remarks, backhanded compliments, or flat-out rude comments at some point.

That's just the way it goes. There are people out there who have nothing better to do than to try and tear people down to their level. There always have been these people and there always will be. As much as I think it is obviously valuable to raise children into adults who aren't cruel and mean, I can't control how people raise their kids - so I think it is is equally as valuable to help others learn how to handle and cope with the insults that they do recieve.

Someone can insult you in a variety of ways: they can talk about you behind your back, whisper about you when you walk by, point and laugh, mimic you, give you a backhanded compliment ("Wow, you're so brave going out in public with a face full of acne"), or they can do more indirect things like make intimidating facial expressions or stare you down.

How to Cope In the Now

People don't start fights for no reason. Think about what it is that they're hoping to get from you and the insult. Are they trying to intimidate you? Are they trying to make you look stupid / incompetent in front of others? Are they expecting you to cry ? Are they trying to start an argument? Think before you react, since you don't want to give them the satisfaction of doing exactly what they sought to make you do.

If someone is insulting you in a public setting, like at school or work, their goal is obviously to rais